I'm throwing a pity party and everyone's invited

Yup... like the title says, I'm throwing a pity party. I'm doing this here to serve a couple of purposes... I'm hoping if I blog it, I'll get it out of my system quickly and be able to move on and function somewhat normally for the rest of the day/week/month/undetermined period of time. I'm also going to own up to something.

So... an old friend, part of a group with whom I had a falling out 3 years ago and the only one who seems willing to get over it and be civil (nay, even occaisionally friendly) has just announced she's pregnant. 11 weeks. Conceived on her honeymoon.

I'm thrilled for her. Honest I am.

But at the same time I'm a wee bit bummed. Why? Because (and here comes the owning up... cherish it, there will likely be no further references to it)... we've been trying for a considerable amount of time and we're having difficulties. The kind of difficulties that require significant intervention. The kind of difficulties that lead to being heartbrokenly jealous in the midst of being happy for someone else. I imagine I'll go through something similar in a couple of weeks when I go to another friend's baby shower.

So, now on to bigger and better things... A couple of weeks ago, I started a 'letter writing campaign'. No, not petitioning companies and governments to mend their ways and stop doing things I object to... 'cuz I generally only do that when I think it might amount to something (I'm something of a champion 'letter of complaint' writer ;) )... but social letter-writing. That lost art involving actual pens, actual paper, and actual envelopes! It all started with a group of gals online who were looking for 'pen pals'... so I joined the fray and now have 3 pen pals on there (I've written to 2 of them so far)... and that got me thinking about an old friend with whom I shared letters for a 4 month-stretch back in '94 (13 years ago... what an oddly appropriate number *laugh*)... so I wrote to him, too (having recently reconnected with him thanks to FaceBook). Well, last week I got my first pen pal letter in the mail... and I see from a facebook status that there's a good chance I'll be getting a letter from my old friend, too :) That put a smile on my face this morning... it's so nice to get mail that's not a bill or junk... and it's even nicer to look forward to hearing from an old friend in a real letter... not some hastily typed short email or wall post or online message of any kind, but a real letter... written on real paper with real ink. Maybe it's just because I'm crazy, but I think there's far more of a connection with someone if you're writing actual letters that require thought and planning and effor than if you're just using electronic media.

Anyway... I'll focus on the prospects of lots of fun mail over the next while to distract me from the pity party ;)

Have a great one, folks! (assuming anyone actually reads this damn thing)